How to Tie a Stock Tie

Um … not really. 

I have no idea how to tie a stock tie which is really odd for someone who has shown at more than 30 rated shows! How is that possible you ask? Velcro. Yup. I have two very lovely ties that simply velcro around the neck. One is not so lovely any more as it's been through several show seasons, but the other is quite nice and looks very good under my coat.

No, I am not about to cry. Excuse the horrible expression and focus on the tie!

See? The tie looks quite nice and no one can even tell that it's the dorky equivalent of a clip on. Until I take my coat off. Then I am missing that lovely splay of folds and fabric that are just so quintessential dressage.

See how lovely a real tie can be? (Random internet photo - not me or anyone I know.)

So a few weeks ago I ordered the tie below. Hmm … was my reaction. I ordered a medium, but I think it was too big. It just didn't hang quite right. It could also be that I am a bit of an idiot and can't even make a ready-tied stock tie work.

Maybe if it was slightly smaller around the neck?

And then came the Blogger Gift Exchange. I decided that maybe someone else could pick out a stock tie that I might like so I put a tie on my wish list. Many thanks to Appy Does Dressage for picking out a tie that will actually work! (With some practice, I am sure.)

Even though Hubby was hungry and I was supposed to be cooking dinner, I pulled out the tie (it had just been delivered) and the directions and set to work tying my very first big girl tie. Some time later, I realized that hubby already had dinner going and the tie was nowhere near "tied."

I finally gave up and asked Hubby for help. He put the tie on himself (it was really quite funny) and showed me how a man ties a business suit tie (quite sexy to watch in my opinion). Part way through his demonstration, I explained that while the first part looked right, we were missing a step. 

He then proceeded to study the directions and attempted to tie the tie for me. He finally admitted that the directions were screwy and went back to cooking dinner while I got on YouTube to find a tutorial on stock ties. 

There are many videos from which to choose, so I picked one at random and tried to follow along. Hubby was watching over my shoulder offering suggestions. Right away we realized that we had been missing a crucial step; the hole in the center of the tie has a purpose. Oops. Once we figured out how to run the long end through the hole and then back down, the tie started to make a lot more sense!

That hole has a purpose … d'oh!

We rewound the video that shows the first knot at least a dozen times. Hubby finally figured out what the girl was doing and showed me. After that however, we had to rewind over and over to get the next part. I have to give Hubs a ton of credit. He has never, ever in his life seen a stock tie, so he didn't even know what the finished product was supposed to look like, but even so, he was able to figure out the second knot.

I love the tie, and I am thrilled with it, but I need to spend a lot of time practicing that knot. I can't wait to actually wear it this next show season. 

But seriously people, how embarrassing is it to have your husband explain how to tie a stock tie?