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How Much Do You Make?

11/24/2014

13 Comments

 
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Money. Nothing can cause people to judge faster than knowing how much someone makes. We look at people and criticize them for having too much, or wonder what kind of poor choices they've made to have so little. Even Dr. Ramey just wrote about being "in it for the money."

Talking about our incomes makes us uncomfortable. Other than the whole being judged aspect, I don't know why that is. Revealing how much we spent on something is just as disagreeable. 

It was horribly difficult to report how much I spent every month in 2012.  I wrote 13 very detailed posts reporting every penny that I spent on my two horses. I did that series to hold myself accountable; I really didn't know how much I was actually spending each month. I also intended the series to be educational. Most people who don't yet show think that only the very wealthiest can afford it. I wanted to illustrate that showing horses can be done on a budget. While my intentions were good, it still felt like I was getting butt-naked each month.

I find that I am once again about to be in the awkward position of being metaphorically nude as I discuss my finances with the rest of the world. Obviously, I could just keep it to myself, but frankly, I am going to need some help in finding the right horse. Being transparent about my budget might help me make some connections that I might otherwise miss.

Doing so however, reveals an awful lot about myself that I don't necessarily need everyone to know. When we state our position so publicly, we invite criticism with judgement not far behind. Most of us love to offer advice, but when there is a dollar figure attached, the opinions can get pretty passionate.

I've already (patiently, I might add) listened to what I should do in searching for a horse. I've also been advised not to by from this type of seller, but rather from that one. I've also sought counsel from my two trainers. Their advice has been spot on which is why there is no pony suddenly filling up Sydney's recently vacated stall. 

I get that readers, acquaintances, and plain old busy bodies just want to offer their two cents worth, but when you offer me that advice, please remember that I have owned quite a few horses in my lifetime and only one of them didn't quite work out. I trust my instincts, I just need help making connections to honest sellers.

I am working on a post that actually reveals what I am searching for and what I can afford to spend. If only I could just add a few details to this pony and hit print!

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Color by number?!
13 Comments
Tracy link
11/23/2014 10:58:42 pm

The best thing I ever did in my horse search was be up front and honest with both myself and those closest to me in terms of what I needed, what I wanted and what I had to spend.

Reply
Bakersfield Dressage link
11/24/2014 09:46:03 pm

Good advice. My problem for the first week or so of my search was being too vague about what I wanted. I am getting clearer and clearer about what I want, so prospects are starting to looking better and better. :0)

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Lauren link
11/23/2014 11:52:35 pm

My advice is to get a unicorn. It's pretty much fool proof.

Reply
SprinklerBandit link
11/24/2014 06:18:40 am

This x100

Reply
Bakersfield Dressage link
11/24/2014 09:46:27 pm

LOL - LOVE it!!!!!!

lytha
11/24/2014 12:13:14 am

This fits with my rant of the day, when I discovered that Amazon.de has just this year introduced Cyber Monday to Germany. I asked my man if he knows what that is, he said no. Well soon everyone will - I suppose, despite Germany's hatred of Kapitalismus. I also explained to him the origin of the term Black Friday, how horrible. Now I've learned that Amazon has turned Cyber Monday into "Cyber Monday Week" - starting today. I don't know what to think of this, except it's another way Europe is becoming more like America, despite all efforts to stop it (France has done much better at stopping it!).

Schoolteachers make more here, and have a job guaranteed for life, and have premium health insurance. It is the only reason we're still here. If he loves it, and it gives security, it would be foolish to lose it.

I LOVED your horse budgeting posts. We put everything into Quicken and it's really hard to look at. I've spent way too much on training this cheap horse. I often wonder if I should have bought a trained one, but then I realize that training never ends.

Thinking you as I help my husband grade papers tonight. I'm not allowed to grade, but I'm allowed to enter the individual scores for each math problem into a spreadsheet that calculates grades.

Reply
Bakersfield Dressage link
11/24/2014 09:49:40 pm

For such a big planet, it's amazing to connect with people with such similar beliefs, values, and experiences. I definitely avoid all of the frenzied shopping and deal hunting myself. I hate that we give gifts at Christmas. I would so much rather spend Christmas eve sipping champagne and watching a roaring fire. :0)

As far as grading papers … I test on Tuesdays which means I'll have a ginormous stack to grade tomorrow myself!

Reply
emma link
11/24/2014 02:56:31 am

i'll be curious to hear more about your dream pony! as a reader i appreciate the posts breaking down our hobby into actual dollars and cents. those posts help to actually inform my plans / goals, etc. and my impression that some things are made unnecessarily hush hush...

Reply
Bakersfield Dressage link
11/24/2014 09:51:59 pm

You know, it's funny, but I don't feel like I am looking for a dream horse (or pony!). I've always been really open to whatever I get. Maybe I should feel like he or she should be my dream horse. I hadn't really thought of it like that. I feel like if I focus on a dream horse, I might miss a diamond in the rough. :0)

Reply
jenj
11/24/2014 03:34:48 am

Finding a new horse is sort of like shopping for a spouse - it's REALLY REALLY HARD! Even if you have a good-sized budget for your area, it's still hard to find a match. You're lucky to have two trainers to help you out, and hopefully lots of good contacts. You've done this before, so just be patient and your unicorn is sure to show up!

Reply
Bakersfield Dressage link
11/24/2014 09:54:07 pm

You made me laugh out loud!!!!!

I showed the ads for three prospects to my trainer last night and to my surprise she studied each ad very carefully and made some good suggestions about what to do and look for when I check them out. I do feel grateful to have someone to run this stuff by.

Reply
Tori link
11/25/2014 01:50:54 am

Do people actually care what other people make? What their horse budgets are? When people have a nice budget I usually just think - lucky!

Good luck with your search!

Reply
Bakersfield Dressage link
11/25/2014 08:29:18 am

I am not sure that Joe Shmoe cares what I make, but I do think that there is some judgment passed when you (meaning me) can't afford at least a $20,0000 dressage horse. I think that you're taken less seriously by the "pros." And it could be that less expensive horses are simply not as competitive as the big fancy warmbloods which means they aren't on anybody's radar.

Either way, I've been subtly snubbed for not riding a warmblood. It wasn't a conscious choice to go with an Arab, it's just what I had.

But thanks! We'll see what I end up with. :0)

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    About the 
    Writer & Rider

    I am a lifetime rider. 
    I began endurance riding in 1996 where I ultimately completed five, one-day 100 mile races, the 200-mile Death Valley Encounter, and numerous other 50, 65, and 75 mile races. I began showing dressage in 2010.
    ​Welcome to my dressage journey.

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    About Speedy G

    Speedy went from endurance horse to dressage horse and occasional trail horse. He is a 2004, 15'1 hand, purebred Arabian gelding. His Arabian Horse Registry name is G Ima Starr FA.

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    Izzy was started as a four-year old and then spent the next 18 months in pasture growing up. I bought him as a six-year old, and together, we are schooling the dressage basics. He is a 2008, 16'3 hand Zweibrücker gelding. His Rheinland Pfalz-saar International (RPSI) name is Imperioso.
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