A Moment to Reflect

That sounded so much better than "a whiny moment." I try really hard not to whine as I really am an optimist. I look for the good in a situation first, and I usually find the silver lining. I don't let myself feel victimized, and I don't blame anyone else when life goes awry.

Even so, there are days when things just don't go my way. Yesterday's ride was one of those times. It was so bad that I came home and hugged the crap out of Tobias, our 90 pound black lab. That dog is the most tolerant, long suffering animal on the planet. I sat on the floor, wrapped both arms around his considerable girth, and buried my face in his shoulder. I breathed deeply and felt much of the disappointment and frustration of the day seep slowly from my body .

His nemesis is on the left.

I don't know what went wrong during the ride. Well that's not exactly true as everything went wrong; Izzy was a ball of unrelenting tension who also thought his ass was on fire. I'm pretty sure he was also hearing voices and seeing dead people. I just don't know why it went so terribly wrong.

It started the moment my butt touched the saddle. I did nothing but walk for the first 15 minutes in an effort to soothe him and get him thinking about me being up there. I should have quit right there, but I proceeded to work for another 30 minutes at the trot thinking going forward might dissipate some of that tension. I half halted every stride but he simply would not or could not soften his body.

When those 45 minutes yielded nothing. I took him on a hack around the neighborhood; 30 minutes later, he was still throwing a temper tantrum. By that point, I knew we had to at least try to end the day with at least one right answer, so I put him to work certain that he would finally take a deep breath and give it up. Nope. 

As a last ditch effort, I tried to school a few halts. As soon as I patted his neck and said good b... - he tried to bolt, and not for the first time if the day. Holy cow. When a horse can't even stop (I gave up on a halt) after an hour and a half, it's time to hang it up.

I pulled his saddle in the arena like I usually do and watched as he cantered and trotted along the fence line. When I went to get him a few minutes later, I did some easy ground work - walking at my shoulder and then backing a few steps. I desperately needed him to feel successful about something from the day. 

A selfie from before the ride. My hopes were high.

I don't mind a setback, especially if I know what has caused it. In this case, I am baffled. We've had more than a week of fabulous rides. I had a haircut planned for this afternoon, but I've already cancelled it. I really want to get back on him this afternoon and see if we can do a quick see I told you you can do it ride. If he'll give me anything that resembles normal work, I'll call it a day.

And if not, there might be a for sale sign taped to his butt. Horses ... sheesh!