You're quitting/giving up/caving?
No, no, no. I am just taking a very well-thought out break. I think I am on to something with Sydney, and I want to continue the work I am doing without interrupting the routine. When I finished riding Sydney on Monday, he and I were both happy and relaxed. I had done the long-lining followed by a short and pleasant under saddle session. It was all good, Baby!
And then ... I gave a heavy sigh when I realized Wednesday was only two days away. What would happen then? How could I long-line before the lesson? Would I have time? Would there be an explosion back in JL's arena if I didn't? What if she directed to me to shorten his reins and I got tense because shortening is when he gets tense? Crud. Said with a thud.
I got that bad taste in my mouth. You know the one? It happens when I have to do something I don't want to do. Right there, on the spot, I decided I had to tell JL I needed a few weeks off. Not to quit riding. Not to ride with someone else. But just a another week or so to work through this issue with Sydney.
I have found through earlier experiences that if I quit trusting my gut, things go to sh*t. My intuition is very good. When I really listen to my instincts, good things usually result. I can only improve my riding by improving my feel. And that's what's happening with Sydney right now. We're feeling each other out in a kind of dance. He's deciding whether or not to trust me, and I am learning his moves. What does he like? What makes him nervous?
Eyes on the ground are a GREAT thing, but sometimes we need to almost close our own eyes and really listen to our horses. That's where I am am right at this moment. I am listening very hard to what Sydney is trying to tell me. And I feel that if it gets quiet enough, I'll be able to hear him and move forward.
By the way, Wednesday's (non-lesson) schooling work turned out to be very successful! More about that tomorrow.